Of Chance Encounters

Genre: slight mystery could be a romance

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When you board a bus and can seat anywhere you want, do you prefer the aisle seat or the window seat? In most buses here, unless you have pre-booked a seat on a coach, usually the first person gets the window seat and the next person gets the dubious honour of the aisle seat.

Now I don’t know if it is just me or if anyone else does that little selfish act of praying and hoping the stranger who sits next to you is kinda hot?

Not you, not you not, oh no don’t stop” you think to yourself as you watch people walk past, trying not to make eye contact because they will stop and ask you if the seat is taken and strange enough that’s the moment the hot stranger passes you by isn’t; it ironic?

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Finally you spot a likely candidate, you wouldn’t mind spending the rest of your life with…oops I mean the duration of the journey. They have the most remarkable eyes, soulful and expressive and smiles, smiles like a beauty queen. You shift your bags to the side and scoot over to the window side to make sure there is no mistaking it the seat is indeed free you smile and gesture nonchalantly  at the vacant sit, when they ask is anyone there you casually shake your head like it’s no big deal as shimmies right next to you.

You making some small talk and find out you getting off at the same stop and that you both already have tickets but she forgot to buy something, you don’t ask what because it’s rude to pry anyway she asks you to watch her bags while she makes a quick dash out the bus. You agree and now you don’t have to lie or be weird when someone asks “is this seat taken?”

They said would be gone only a moment, but suddenly the bus gets full; your seat is the only one with a “missing person” the driver starts the bus and you suddenly don’t remember what your fellow passenger looked like, the colour of her eyes or what they were wearing, you didn’t even ask their name….

You call the conductor and say “Excuse me, someone hasn’t gotten back into the bus yet and they left their luggage….”

The conductor asks you what for must they do because the bus operates on a timetable and they can’t wait for even a moment longer and naturally they are already late so can’t even possibly afford the delay.

What do you do? What do you do?

You could get off the bus with the bag but you have substantial luggage of your own too, and getting a refund from the bus operators is although not impossible, it’s not the easiest thing in the world.  You could just adopt the bag for a little while and hope they make a plan to catch up with the bus and considering they did say would be disembarking at same destination as you, if they don’t you could take the bag to the police there and maybe they can search for something to identify the owner or make a radio announcement or something…. Anything….

If you were me, you would be in bus sitting next to stranger’s bag wondering how you got yourself into this mess. I mean I sat here first and they sat next to me, and oh what lovely eyes she had..uhmm so I admit “they” looked hot and smiled a lot what guy wud say NO!

What if there is goblin in the bag? I have heard stories of how when people no longer want their money making charms or goblins because they require too much blood sacrifice, they dump them in bags at crossroads or some such and some poor hapless fellow picks up the curse… what if that’s what happened here, suddenly I am not sure whether I believe that voodoo stuff or not, do you?

What’s in the bag?….

What Would Jesus Do? Jesus would help a stranger in need, right? And cast out the demons in the bag, probably divine the owner’s address and phone number too….

What’s in the bag?….

What if it’s a bomb…., I have watched enough the terrorist attack movies to know that the standard operating procedure of bombing a public area is leaving unattended luggage on a bus, train or at the station….

What’s in the bag?…

As the bus is pulling out of the station the bag simultaneously starts to vibrate and hum, my heart misses several beats. This is how it ends, my life. They say just before you die your life flashes before your eyes, mine didn’t, I heard something instead, music; the beginning of a classic song…

Knock knock knocking on heaven’s door…..

Suddenly it hits me, its a ringtone, hey it’s a phone ringing. A cellphone rings in a bag you was entrusted to watch and there’s no one else but you….. what do you do? What do you do?

If you were me you would answer the phone…. Hesitantly…

Turns out it is the bag’s owner.

Hi I am Hazel” she says and apologizes for missing the bus and imposing on me like this but could I keep her bag, and she will be hitching a ride in next available vehicle so will be right behind me and will meet up later.

It’s a date” I reply.

~B

Blogbattle Entry themed Hazel

PS moral of this story, I think you must just have your name and contact details clearly marked on your luggage, and careful what you wish for……

^_^

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Of Coffee And Bicycle Rides With Psychos

 

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If you were having coffee with me we would go on a bike ride.

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When was the last time you rode a bike? I haven’t ridden a bike in ages, but its true what they say about bicycles, falling off is easy and oh, yeah you never really forget how to fall.
I had forgotten how riding a bike is so exhilarating the wind in your face, locks being blown behind you; man and machine ONE.

The bicycle is a curious vehicle. Its passenger is its engine.
~John Howard

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Enough of this Sunday stroll…… lets hurt a little, if you were having coffee with me, we going  to go up a steep slope, the further we ride, the heavier the pedals feel and that deep burn you feel in your thighs, its like we doing leg day at the gym, you gotta put in the work. When we finally stop your legs will feel like jelly but its totally worth it. I am fitness junkie you see get fit or die trying. I wish we had that tandem bike and we could ride together how much fun would that be? I promise would pick a route that is mostly downhill.

If you were having coffee with me, we would be having coffee instead the coffee mug would be full of ice cold water on the rocks, after the fun ride in the sun re-hydration is recommended. I am a big fan of the water therapy averaging 8 glasses at the least, you cant really have too much of water unless of course you have waaay too much.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that there is supposedly a test which can show if you are a psycho or not, separating the sheep from the murderous goats as it were by simply answering the following test:

This is a genuine psychological test. It is a story about a girl.
While at the funeral of her own mother, she met a guy whom she did not know.
She thought this guy was amazing, so much her dream guy she believed him to be, that she fell in love with him there and then … A few days later, the girl killed her own sister.

Question: What is her motive in killing her sister?

If you get the answer correct congratulations you think like a psychopathic and should be very careful to not let that crazy show, blend in. I aced this test in case you are wondering and don’t know whether I should be happy or scared about it.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that I have successfully managed to teach my twin nephews how to stomp on and kill cockroaches after numerous demonstrations and getting them to not run away from roaches like they are child eating beasts as they were doing earlier. With all the money I am going to save from not having to buy bug spray I am going to buy myself a set of earphones that don’t fall out when I run I need some snug fitting earphones so I can enjoy the simple pleasure of listening to music while I jog.
The best thing about teaching the twins to stomp on cockroaches is that not only are they taking care of my slight infestation problem, the hurricanes of pure energy are burning up excess energy and practically falling asleep on their feet without the usual drama…yey peace and quiet, they look like angels when they sleep.

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A baby on a tiger

~B

PS have you figured out the answer to the test?

Answer: She was hoping that the guy would appear at the funeral again.

If you answered this correctly, you think like a psychopath. This was a test by a famous American psychologist used to test if one has the same mentality as a killer. Many arrested serial killers took part in this test and answered it correctly. If you didn’t answer correctly – good for you. Ask your friends to take the test too for awareness …..If your friends hit the jackpot, may I suggest that you keep your distance. (If you got the answer correct, please let me know so I can take you off my friend list…)

PPS on a totally related matter Do not believe everything that you read on the Internet, have an awesome week

Of Now or Never #LeFemmeRemix: A Review

I was scrolling through music channels wondering what happened to the music scene because most music videos seem to be all about the all up in your face provocative sex appeal, skimpy dancers doing highly suggestive dance routines to distract us from the waning mostly inaudible lyrical content and managing to objectify women in the process. Pretty soon people are just going to be naked in hip hop videos… oh, wait, didn’t someone famous do one of those already?  Anyhoo as you were.

I used to really love hip hop, back in the day when Rap really meant Rhythm And Poetry when it was a raw expressive force, lyrical gangsters spitting out verse on the microphones, that would explode the tape decks when they were in rap mode, you feel me?Call me old school but could you throw me back to a time when you could feel the emotion in rap from the love they felt for their mums, loyalty to their homies, and venom unleashed at haters, disintegrating those who would oppose; to the rage against injustice. Now, hip hop is a menagerie of multi-tattooed, chain wearing, expensive drinks sipping, posing artists all about image, they rap about how much money they got, expensive cars they woke up in, sex, and I can barely hear half of the other stuff they mumble out.

I thought perhaps I had lost my love for rap till I stumbled across this track by DJ Switch and Ms Cosmo.

To celebrate the phenomenal creature that is woman; phenomenal woman; Ms Cosmo DJ calls out her favourite female emcees to feature in the #LefemmeRemix of DJ Switch’s Now or Never track.

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Ms Cosmo

The result is 8 minutes of true grit, ten verses and ten of South Africa’s baddest female hip hop artists making a a point in a world where the rap scene is predominantly male….. It’s the rise of the female rappers.

I am hooked to the hook of the song:

What happened to rap?
Yeah, what happened to rap?
Hip hop used to drop bars now we just dab

And I cant decide which is my favourite verse or who slays the most, because its that awesome, but in order of appearance:

Opening verse is Meg Mafia also known as the North Goddess and she’s got purpose just like a pure breed warrior.

Rapping was about the bars but now it’s just a circus

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Meg Mafia

Ms Supa is super human and two times a queen with a straight flush.

You got a beat but you can’t use it

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Ms Supa

Nelz wishes rappers rap more instead of talking about rap

The rise of the female rapper
The rap game is full of actors
I see no rappers just wrappers

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Nelz

Representing cape town and keeping it real Miss Celaneous

Shame man they look the same, some are same so uniform
He said if you wanna be part of the clique outchea, you gotta

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Miss Celaneous

Rogue knows what happened to real rap and it aint dead its going to rise like a phoenix.

No longer looking for lyricism
Just give em beat that bumps the bass

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Rouge

Patty Monroe who  is practically a brand unto herself now that’s clever

Now or never was an all male endeavour
You failed to deliver

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Patty Monroe

Phresh Clique repping Cape Town they coming to win.

on stage
I rage,
I blaze,
fans feel
amazed

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Phresh Clique

on stage
I rage,
I blaze,
fans feel
amazed

Fifi Cooper does no metaphors now if only someone would translate for me the rest of her verse so I know what she own about

why you put me next to kids that begs for Ice-Cream

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Fifi Cooper

BK is the one who gots one problem rappers don’t make sense

Some careers born a little pre-mature
These weak raps need to incubate a little more

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BK

Clara T is about clarity and no lies, aint looking for anything she cant get for herself

Until you decide
And when you look in the mirror
You see that look in your eyes
That you aren’t breathing the same air as me

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Clara T

Gigi Lamayne is a serious heavy hitter  she wields her femininity like a blunt force don’t mess with the hybrid

Royal blood on my pad
I’m always Ultra with the bleeds

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This track is what rap is about, standing for something; real, live and raw. Shout Out to all those keeping it real and if  you didn’t know these ladies watch out for them, trust me they making a mark.

If I listen to this song a thousand times I am so going to post the lyrics the way we used to do it back in the day before google when the only way to  get song lyrics was to listen rewind and press play 

~B

PS Happy women’s month and  In case you missed it I am crushing on this song.

And if you into rap what’s your take on the rap game and music scene in general?

Blogbattle entry themed menagerie

 

#LeFemmeRemix images and track link courtesy of Ms Cosmo

 

Of Coffee, Bougainvillea and Babysitting

If you were having coffee with me we would be trying out bougainvillea flower tea.

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I was sitting outside feeling the sun on my skin and happened to look up and see the bougainvillea flowers shining red (or is that purple) in the morning light.

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Inspiration and curiosity struck, hmmmm what if I crushed those flowers and drank them. Thank Google for knowing everything because I checked the internet if drinking bougainvillea was as a thing or if it was poisonous to drink and according to the internet it’s a herbal tonic that is claimed to be good for colds and flu so here we go…

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The smell of the tea is a bit strong and leafy. If you smell it with your eyes closed you can easily tell yep this is definitely a leafy beverage. And the taste of it, I wouldn’t say vile but let’s just say I won’t be having a second cup thank you very much. Curiosity sated

If you were having coffee with me, we would be babysitting my twin nephews who are 18 months old. Picture a hurricane of pure energy and then imagine there being two of them, it’s definitely more than a handful.

They still don’t talk yet (except saying mama) but they can cry, why can’t babies be born talking; life would be oh so much easier if they could tell you what’s bothering them, you know basic stuff, feed me, change me, entertain me……

Feeding time is such a messy affair, you know what I think would be great idea, to simply dress kids in the colours of the foods they are about to eat that way the stains won’t be as visible or better yet, you could just cut out the middle manchild and spit out butternut and let it dribble over your favourite scarf, spill juice all over the carpet and grind potatoes into your shirt sleeves then finish off by sprinkling bread crumbs into your hair…Bon appétit

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Oh yes question, when you are feeding kids and you make aeroplane noises do you imagine the are people on board the aeroplane, no? And you know what; it makes kids grow up with an unrealistic expectation of the tastiness of planes. FYI they taste like steel rubber and jet A1 fuel, don’t ask me how I know this, suffice it to say I am a curious busy body with one heck of an imagination.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that if you are babysitting be careful not to feed them sugar rich snacks. The Sugar Rush is brutal if you think twin hurricanes of pure energy are destructive picture twin hurricanes of energy tripping on sugar. Books are being ripped apart, drawers are being opened, and everything is on the floor, some of it broken.

 

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Placing the coffee table on top of chair on top of the of the dining room table was a bad idea, because one of the twins is now on top of that stool clapping hands and giggling and trying to give me a heart attack in the process I mean what if they fall and break their brains what would I tell their mother.

“Watch the kids for a little” while she said, “it’s easy” she said, “they aren’t fussy at all” she said, “it will be fun” she said and “I will be back just now” she said…. Feels like she has been gone forever, you know how time doesn’t fly when you aren’t having fun?

If you were having coffee with me you would help me babysit keep an eye on the kids make sure they are playing nicely and not biting each other or grabbing toys from each and screaming for no good reason, and when they are silent and out of sight, RUN and find them that’s when they are being the most naughty.

If you were having coffee with me I would ask you if you dance. If you say you don’t I would tell you are lying (to yourself and me) Kids grow up knowing you can dance to music before they can even talk, play them good music and watch them dance like no one is watching I think we just grow up and become way too self-conscious, to enjoy the little things in life, laughing when someone makes a funny face, giggling when tickled and clapping when entertained.

If you were having coffee with me I would ask you does it hurt to feel sleepy because the twins are at their most fussiest just before they sleep, irritable and crying yet they won’t just lie down and sleep. It’s a bit of a struggle to get them to calm down, can’t keep calm when you have got all that energy.

Shhhh they are finally sleeping they look like little tiny angels when they sleep…..aaaawe

~B

 

PS imagine you ask someone to bake a cake for the twins and that they should write happy birthday on both and this is what they do:

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happy birthday on both

have a great week ahead and Go Team Olympics

Of Girls Like You and Guys Like Me

I wrote you a very long  letter on a midnight-blue themed writing pad sprinkled with stars using a scented gel ink pen I wrote my heart out and sealed it with a loving kiss….

2015-03-01 09.28.jpg It’s still in my dresser drawer I never posted it, because girls like you don’t do stuff like that you laugh and call it corny.

When girls like you laugh, everyone laughs, it’s so natural and cute how you are always in the center of the room regardless of where exactly you are standing and you don’t seem to notice the attention you draw, just like a butterfly unaware of its own beauty.

Girls like you date guys who are alpha males, who drive fancy cars who are always flush with cash to blow on you, your friends and your friends’s friends because you always roll as a clique. You say you like guys who are man enough to handle you because apparently you are a candle, too hot to be handled by just anybody.

Girls like you like Bad Boys Bad Boys Bad Boys. Boys who wear their arrogance like a T-shirt and treat people like dirt because they are the big dogs and have the muscles and tats to back to it up. Guys who blow smoke in your face and ask you if you have problem sport and when you try to walk away they grip your arm with a vice like grip until you apologise.

Girls like you only call guys like me when you need something, and then suddenly we are besties, for a second it feels good to be appreciated, the weakness in guys like us.  Remember that time you accidentally deleted an important project from your laptop, the laptop that I helped you buy because you didn’t know much about computers… How about when you showed up on my doorstep drunk as a skunk because you had had a fight with Mr. Bad Boy and lost your home keys at the club, so you couldn’t go to your place, I held your hair back while you cried and threw up into my favourite bucket and in the morning I found you a locksmith for your door and painkillers for the hangover.

Girls like you take guys like me for granted.

I always say to myself this is the last time I do you a favour because all you do is take but I was raised a gentleman, a little too goody goody, a little too polite…. even if you asked for flowers……,i_give_you_my_heart.jpg

I would pluck out petals from my own heart and hand them to you and watch you hand them over to your Mr. Bad Boy because you needed a thank you gift for the obviously expensive gift he gave you to apologise for the way he has been behaving, I can change he says.

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You don’t even see me stitching my chest back from where I ripped out my heart to give to you and you trampled all over it and didn’t even look back.

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When you finally discover your Mr.Bad Boy is an ugly duck boy who won’t change into a graceful swan; of which I tried to tell but maybe girls like you are like a moth and you like to burn, you don’t notice me even as I hug you and tell you that maybe your next boo will be Mr. Right, you cry and keep repeating that all men are the same, and then go and find the exact same guy in a different body……

Nice guys finish last they say.

And if one day you wake up and you are missing me it’s because I grew tired of chasing after you when to girls like you I am just a wallflower, I see these things and I understand…

~B

 

 

 

Of My 3rd Anniversay and 10k views

Its official me and my blog, we married because I got a WordPress notification that wished me a happy anniversary whoop whoop it has been three years since I signed up.

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For the first half of the three years (just showing I have a solid grasp on the basics of algebra….. speaking of algebra doesn’t that sound like something mermaids would wear to a math ball under the sea {Algae Bra}…. Now you are thinking it too) My blog was set to a privacy mode such that the only eyes that read my crazy were mine but in the past year and half I unleashed it upon the inter-web: worldwide….

And the best present I could ever get I just clocked 10 000 views

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10k views

yey ^_^….. maybe it was one person who clicked 10 000 times maybe it was 10 000 people  who each visited my blog once…. I don’t care I don’t care I am just happy to have had an audience… much love ♥♥♥♥ danke, tatenda, thank you from my blog and I

I took the liberty of drawing a graph to show my blog traffic in the past 3 years I guess its true what they say about it being about what you put in….

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It probably makes more sense to aliens than either you or me, see I was day dreaming about mermaids and bras during math classes and might have discussed Harry Potter with a headless chicken

I never usually check my stats but today I did and thought why not make a quick shout out by country if I can get it down correct

So leggo:

Visitors from The United States seem to be the leading the hit counter holla to a few of my fave Steph, Tara, Rachael, Josh, Yinglan and the blogbattle family

And then the UK …. Phoenix Grey, D

Ireland Elle

Greece M.L. Kappa

Japan Ashi

Nepal R

Josephine, Afuaawo, Mimi

Coming to African countries Uganda seems to be leading on my top interactions shout out to Uganda Sunshine, Writer Chick, Mable,  CynthiaJoel

and then Ghana Josephine, Afuaawo, Mimi

Nigeria Mfon, Nedoux

Botswana Kearoma, Louisa

Rwanda Samira

Namibia Tuli

Zambia Martha,  Mulos

Malawi Lilacs and stuff

South Africa Sinawo

And finally my home country Zimbabwe …. Ndino simudza mureza Whoop whoop shout out to Colleen, CatMakaita, Miss Mona, Pineapple, Mr Mayor, Makupsy … and Zile lol

And to all of you who low key stalk my blog thanks for the support now go   read this and dont be strangers ^_^

~B

PS I know I forgot someone I’ll remember and add you dont worry be happy *whistles* and if I dont know where you blog from, do let me know but who cares they are only imaginary boundaries transcended by clicks and hashtags

 

Of The Handwriting Tag

I was tagged by Josephine  whose blog joseyphina is one of my faves ♥♥♥

The rules are simple. You just have to write the following instructions on a piece of paper, take a picture of it and post it.

These are the instructions:

  • Write your name.
  • Write your blog’s url.
  • Write: The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog.
  • What are you writing with.
  • Draw your favorite emoticon.
  • Write a silly message.
  • Write who you want to tag.

Thanks

here is mine:

hadwritten tag

leggo ^_^ Samira, Pineapple, Colleen, Mable and A Headless Chicken and anyone else who feels like showing off their handwriting to the world feel free to participate in this challenge .

~B

PS So my blog is 3 years old today, it wants cake and a lil laughter ^_^ and I dont follow instructions much ha!