Tag Archives: #coffee

Of Coffee in a time of Cholera

Of Coffee Outbreaks

If you were having coffee with me I would greet you by bumping your fist instead of shaking your hand. “Big Up” I will say and its not a rasta thing even though I will shake my locks and do a little dance.

fist bump

Big Up

beatonm5

We have a cholera outbreak you see, there’s some hand sanitizer by the door for your convenience.

If you were having coffee with me, I would ask you that, when the label on the sanitizer says kills 99.9% of bacteria what do they mean and shouldn’t we walk around being worried about the 0.1% This hardcore die hard germ that is hard to kill like the main actor in an action movie of old but instead of being the good guy it’s the One  bacteria rule us all, one bacteria to find us, One bacteria to bring them all and in the darkness bind us all…….

hand sanitizer

Now that you have finished disinfecting your hands, try not to worry about the One Bacteria that would survive mordor If you were having coffee with me I would offer you some French toast, its basically toast that went to a French I made it myself its surprisingly easy to make I actually wonder why I don’t have it more often.

bakers inn bread

Too bad the leading supplier of bread, Innscor Africa Bread Company, Bakers Inn has increased their price for the standard loaf by 10% to $1.10. Trying not to be alarmist about it but is this another symptom of our ailing country alongside the shortages of fuel and other things?

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that we have a cholera outbreak which has been declared a state of emergency by the government. A lot of finger pointing is going on, as the responsible authorities toss the blame around each other, as if it’s a hot potato which no one wants to hold.  A cholera outbreak is a symptom of bigger issues; from lack of access to clean municipal water, to a broken sewer system contaminating wells and boreholes. People have been complaining that the government spent a lot of money doing “other things” and now require crowdfunding to help deal with the cholera outbreak showing their gross mismanagement.

dnhghorwsaulf_l.jpg

 

cholera outbreak

Harare City council blames vendors invading the city center to sell their wares at undesignated areas and have started a campaign to clean out vendors from the streets of Harare CBD. But in a country with 90% unemployment this is the only way some people can make a living and simply forcing them off the street is going to be an ugly mess after the city council had seemingly let them overrun the city streets, again another symptom of bigger problems with country.

harare vendors

vendors harare cbd

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council raid harare cbdclearing vendors harare cbd

police raid vendors

If you were  having coffee with me I would tell you that the conductor in the public taxi I used today dramatically put on a pair of surgical gloves before handling the taxi fare people were handing him. He made a joke about how you never knew where the money you got came from and he did not want to catch cholera. People were even reluctant to pass the fares of the other passengers as they normally do; those at the back pass to those in front, till it gets to the the conductor. This time he had to stretch out and reach, people individually, I tell you, you cannot make this up.

How has your week been? Whats good whats really really good?

~B

Day 13 of my blog every day challenge Africa: Stories From Home

Photo credit: bakers Inn bread: OfZimba 16 interesting facts about bakers inn

Photo Credit Brezhmalaba

  Zppinfo visetinfo

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Of Coffee and Cabinets

Of Coffee Cabinets

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If you were having coffee with me we would be sitting outside watching the water sprinkler, sprinkling the lawn and I would be wishing I was a child again running and jumping over the spray of the water sprinklers. I can almost hear the laughter and happy giggles from my childhood as if they are just beside me, shhhh can you hear them too?……

lawn sprinkler

I think the heat is getting to me, the days are long and hot, we definitely not in winter anymore, I wish I had a swimming pool in my backyard or a giant pond …….

Speaking of swimming pools, the newly elected president Emmerson Mnangagwa announced his  cabinet ministers and the Minister of Youth, Sport, Arts and Recreation is gold medalist Kirsty Coventry….

Minister of sports Zimbabwe

Gold medalist Kirsty Coventry

This appointment is quite the dive into a cool pool Kirsty Coventry having participated in 5 Olympic games won 7 medals and set 5 world records she is easily the most decorated African Olympian and holds the current global record having highest number of individual Olympic medals of all female swimmers in history.

Since 1980 Zimbabwe has collected a total of eight medals three golds, four silvers and one bronze. Seven of these medals were won by swimmer Kirsty and  the other gold medal by 1980 Zim women’s hockey team. Kirsty Coventry has a track record of supporting the country has even denied requests to change her citizenship to countries that head-hunted her.

Who knows with a new minister sports maybe we might see our sports, arts and recreation sector focusing more on diversifying than simply soccer which seems to be the be all and all of sport and the rest not getting any mention or support until of course they win……

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that as for the rest of the cabinet minister appointments, the most notable thing is the absence of old familiar names who have always been recycled and reshuffled into cabinet positions as one would shuffle the drawers of an antique cabinet and call it a new cabinet.

old cabinet

Although the cabinet didn’t achieve the promised 50/50 gender parity its gone up from 24% to 31% female representatives and we have our first female Minister of defence.

So lets see our new cabinet, has technocrats, more women and young blood, its a step in the right direction, is this simply another ploy at the power games or a genuine move? Well all l I want is a country which works.

~B

Day 7 of my blog every day challenge themed Africa: Stories from home

#MyAfricaMyWords

Photo Credit: Kirsty Coventry www.kirstycoventry.com

 

Of Coffee And The Simple Life

Of coffee with the simple life…..

Coffee outside

If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you I had to initially draft this post, the hard way, by candlelight, on a piece of paper I saved from being kindling for a fire, fortunately I had a pen and I did not have to use my blood as ink.

Do you hear that? There’s nothing but silence, well not entirely silence.  just the natural silence of the simple life, broken only by livestock, the chirping of birds and the whispering of the pine trees as breeze blows past sounding almost as if it’s a thousand voices whispering your name……..

pine trees

If you were having coffee with, I would tell you that you don’t realise what a good thing you have going, not until you are back in the city, with its big city lights and the first thing that greets you is an assault on your nostrils, by the noxious fumes of commerce and vehicles speeding dizzily past, no time to say hello or goodbye, not even a friendly wave, only a honk of the horn beep beep move get out of the way……

This is the longest period in my adult life that I have spent in the countryside, at my maternal grandparents’ homestead, I pulled weeds from their graves and felt a connection to roots that hold up the tree that is my existence.

If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you that, the pace of life here is different, slower even and the list of priorities might as well as be worlds apart from what happens in the urban parts of the country. Life is simple, a little too simple, I wish I had my laptop, and somewhere to charge it and definitely some Wi-Fi. I have been off the internet grid for a week and some change, and a part of m feels like the world is spinning without me.

In fact the rest of the world is spinning along however imperfectly without a care what happens in such simple corners of the country. The elections came and gone just like they do and here political aspirants come and they make grand speeches and fancy promises then depart in a cloud of dust and smoke, leaving nothing but tyre tracks from the their shiny new off-road four wheel trucks, never to be seen again until the next elections. And this time, this might be sooner than expected, if a rerun is declared, because well a petition was filed challenging the election results and now we wait the constitution court’s ruling.

Watching a beautiful sunset as the night falls, it’s a moonless night, and it would be a dark night were it not for the sky full of stars, nights like this we used to gather round a fire and tell  stories.

sunset

If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you we gathered around a fire, the same fire I saved this sheet of paper from and we told stories, but they weren’t like stories of old, these were real. Stories like about the homestead next to ours the only home without a fire lit, because only death lives there now, and ghostly flames can be seen by late night travellers; everyone there died from some mysterious malady, everyone that is except the first born son who is said to live lavishly abroad but could not come for any of the funerals because they left country claiming political asylum and so now cant return.

It’s a familiar story, those who remain bear a certain resentment for those who manage to escape the shackles of the simple life, chasing paper and never returning except only to be bury or be buried. The last time I was here was for a funeral and before that another funeral, and this land slowly becoming simply graveyards and half abandoned homesteads populated only during funeral services.

Another story that’s not spoken in polite company, the one about the lady who lives by herself, whose husband left, or died or maybe as some suggest she killed him. She is said to be very gracious with her favours as payment in kind for groceries. If you take a loaf a bread to her house, she will accept it with a coy smile and invite you inside, for tea maybe……

If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you my plan was to only spend a night, but the simple life has no room for rushing, every time I say I am ready to leave something comes up, an aunt I must absolutely visit, and of course they will insist you cannot leave before dinner, and by the time dinner is done, its too dark to leave, tomorrow first thing in the morning, but of course that means first thing after breakfast of course breakfast is at lunch………

But finally here we are, I had to insist I would return soon and not wait for another funeral.

Have an awesome week

~B

 

Of Coffee, Democracy, Voting and Elections

Of Coffee, Democracy, Voting and Election Results.

voting

If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you it’s been a nail-biting roller-coaster of a week, waiting for the results of the harmonized election results held on Monday the 30th of July to be announced.

If you were having coffee with me I would ask you not be alarmed, I am safe and sound, and have had to answer the “Are you safe question?” to several people via phone calls, messages, emails, and DMs but to be honest the past couple of days have been hair-raising. You might have seen Zimbabwe, headlining the news, when the army clamped down on opposition party protesters in the city capital, demanding immediate release of unadultered election results by the electoral commission claiming the commission was delaying so it could “massage” the figures.

MDC Protest

The protest turned violent as protesters destroyed property; looting shops, setting fire to vehicles belonging to the ruling party and the military resorted with deadly force. Firing live ammunition into crowds leaving scores of people injured and several fatalities.

Military

If you were having coffee with me, this is the part you would ask me if you heard me correct that military personnel in a nation not at war opened fired on its civilian population. It’s hard to reconcile this image with how the military, just seven months earlier, in November had been on the side of the masses, in a historic seemingly bloodless coup resulting in Robert Mugabe resigning without a single bullet being fired in public.

Zim Coup

when The Army sided with the people

The official statement is that the protesters “overwhelmed the police who were spread thin due to them being stationed throughout the country to safeguard the polls and so the army was deployed.” This might be true but not entirely because on the fateful Wednesday I also happened to be in Harare CBD, and no I was not protesting, I was not even aware of the protests, maybe I should have checked my social media first, it might be full of misleading information but it’s one of the most reliable ways to find out if its safe to venture outside your neighbourhood and into the city.

If you were having coffee with me I would ask you, to imagine you were me, in the city’s central business district, not protesting minding your own business when suddenly: chaos and confusion as people run past you screaming and you don’t need anyone to tell you twice, you also run. Assimilating as you go along; the noxious tear gas fumes assaulting your nostrils, the distinctive sound of gun fire, even though you have never heard a gunshot in your life and you sometimes mistake the sounds of a car backfiring to gunshots when you hear an assault rifle being fired you can’t mistake for anything else…….

A lot of finger pointing is underway, from the opposition party leaders for inciting violence to the party supporters heading mindless calls to action; from the army over-reacting to the protestors being ungovernable and the truth, well the truth is an offspring of mistruth, half-truths meeting whispered conspiracies breeding in a silence where no good thing can flourish.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that the final presidential election results were announced after midnight on the 3rd of August with President elect Emmerson Mnangagwa of the ruling party ZANU PF winning 50.8% of the vote and Nelson Chamisa of the MDC Alliance opposition taking 44% of the polls and the remaining 5.2% split amongst the other 20 presidential candidates.

Walking in the streets of the capital city it’s hard to imagine something as monumental as presidential elections happened, no one is rejoicing, and everyone seems to be grieving, not only for the unfortunate souls, not only from the funerals of those who died on the Wednesday, not just faceless civilians, but people who had loved ones,

and also for the death of hope that had been birthed, still born, that this time around, maybe this time, things would be different……..

If you were having coffee with me I would mention these interesting quotes that I heard:

“its not the voting that counts, but the counting of votes…”

The force of will surpasses the force of will

Well if the polls are to be believed, then we live in a divided nation, where 49.2% of the population did not vote for the president elect, where there are more rural than urban voters in a tale of two voter pools, living with what seem to be completely different concerns and ideals and a diasporian population without a right to vote from their adoptive countries; and where a lot of work needs to be done to unite the population allow room to tolerate divergent views

If you were having coffee with me, I would ask you if you think democracy is a façade or that democracy is unAfrican? I heard some analysts on TV say that it’s a system that is counter to Africa’s Principle of Ubuntu I am because We Are, serving no one but interests of our colonial overlords in their quest to maintain control of Africa’s resources and controlling its finances.

diversity

If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you that I wish I could go to be bed and wake up later, much later, like in maybe five years, because in five years I will be old enough to also be a presidential candidate, if I was president I am sure the world be a better place…… well for me anyway it would be better.

~B

I have just answered a phone call from my mother for the umpteenth who calls every few hours to check if I am still alive and still ok, I should visit her soon and put her fears to rest, she worries so much I start worrying about her too………

Of Coffee, Mars and Sunsets On A Blood Moon

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you I love the moon….. there I said it. *From one moon lover to another.*

Moon howling

 

So obviously a liquid lake would have to be found beneath the surface of Mars before I missed writing about the longest lunar event of the century, wait, they did find liquid water on Mars and I almost missed writing about the total lunar eclipse. In case you didn’t know some researchers have discovered what is believed to be a lake of liquid  water under Mars’s south polar ice cap about 12miles (20km) across and estimated to have a depth of about one meter.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you the lake was discovered using some sciencey radar instruments, its not an exact science but its still science isn’t that ironic, but they are almost sure the readings from their instruments indicate the presence of liquid water. If you are wondering what all the excitement is about, well if they found water on some part of Mars then there’s probably water elsewhere beneath Mars’s surface and if there’s water then that would be like  the X on treasure map indicating where life beyond planet earth would be most likely alone.

If you were having coffee with me I would ask you if you think we are alone in the universe? If you never wondered if  maybe lightning is really from the camera flashes of highly evolved extra terrestrial species taking photos of us……….

If you were having coffee with me, I would ask you if you went outside on Friday night to witness the longest blood moon of the century, with moon passing right through the center of the Earth’s shadow which where it is the widest. And of course Mars just had to be there, the brightest star next to the moon, you couldn’t miss it.

Blood moon

Mars

In the Shona language we say “mwedzi waora” meaning the moon has gone rotten; due to its reddish colour,; which is also why its called the blood moon. The moon goes red because it is in the Earth’s shadow…..

Lunar eclipse

something like this

Here’s a fun fact: The Earth’s shadow is black, if it were black the moon would simply vanish from the night sky. The Earth’s shadow is reddish because of The Scattering Effect of light, the same reason the sky is blue, the midday sun looks yellowish-orange and why sunsets and sunrises are reddish/orangeish. You could think of it like this: During an eclipse the moon will be reflecting light from all the sunrises and sunsets happening as the Earth spins away on its axis day turning into night.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that if it weren’t for the scattering effect of white light from the sun by the Earth’s atmosphere, then the sky would look black and the sun would be white in colour….. how about that ^_^

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that in less than a day my country goes to the polls to vote for the next president and government ….. It feels like the whole country has just taken a deep breath and is now holding its collective breath; dare we dream?

~B

 

Of Coffee with Cat

If you were having coffee with me, I would first apologise that I could not get up to greet you properly, its the cat you see, its sitting on my lap and has decided I must never stand again, not until our chapter is complete…………

A cat

Like a thief of time,

the sleeping cat,

that never moved,

watched you, watching it, watching you…………

You can help yourself to the beverage of your choosing as long as its herbal tea or plain water hot or cold but I wouldn’t recommend the ice cold water, its still winter this side of the hemisphere, oh I hope you dont take a lot of sugar and you like it black because its that time of month when everything runs out,…. waiting for a month end windfall and praying we don’t get unexpected visitors, because what would we even feed them except tea and conversation.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that I have recently discovered I am a cat person, who knew? A stray cat recently adopted me as its new co-owner and it’s worming its way into my yard and life; coming and going as it pleases and disappearing over the fence with a feline grace……

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that the cat is an awesome edition to the family as you may or may not know had a recurring problem with rats, you can read about my misadventures with Mista Whiskas and Speedy Gonzales HERE – The Thing in the ceiling. Well thanks to this feline visitor, havent a seen a single uninvited visitor of the rodent genus.

Quick question: are cats carnivorous?????

If you were having coffee with me, I would ask you which kind of person are you are, because the are four kinds of people:

  • cat people
  • dog people
  • non-pet keepers
  • and those who simply don’t know cause never kept either…..
If you were having coffee with me I would ask you if saw/read the Obama lecture at what would have been Nelson Mandela’s 100th birthday had he been still alive, my last post HERE – Nelson Mandela Lecture is my overview on the presentation. Not taking away from the late Nelson Mandela but sometimes I feel he is being made into a brand much larger than life and commercialized  for self-serving purposes.
Nelson Mandela
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that we have just about a week till we have Zimbabwe’s historic presidential and parliamentary elections on the 30th of July wish us the best of luck…………
~B
PS at what stage do you have “the talk” with your cat when you tell it, its a pet and not quite human but its a non-human person??????
Have an awesome week 
cheers

Of Coffee With Mother

If you were having coffee with me, we would wish Happy Mother’s Day to:
Mothers past
Mothers present
And mothers yet to come

By the time you read this Mother’s Day has probably passed but we should celebrate mothers all day everyday without them we would not exist….

Until of course science advances so much, a whole human being is grown and engineered in a lab; as if they were a machine, assembled in a factory, maybe then we would then have Scientists Day and we would call them parents… But of course there would always be The Rebels who would not conform. ………. Yes my imagination wanders

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you I wanted to pay my mother a surprise visit for mother’s day but I failed to find the cash. We live in times where cash is a commodity more valuable than the balance on your bank statement and is bought and sold by dealers out to make a fortune since banks hardly ever have any. The last ATM I actually saw dispense cash was a Golix bitcoin ATM, but of course the Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe the RBZ has banned crypto-currency trading and financial institutions facilitating bitcoin transactions. I am sure cryptocurrencies have their problems and risks but our Reserve Bank could have tried to find a way to use and regulate and perhaps alleviate our cash shortage situation instead of giving 60 day ultimatum to cryptocurrency traders, well my crypto-currency broker emailed that they trying to engage relevant regulatory authorities.

If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you I had to settle for making my mother a surprise phone call instead and confess to feeling guilty at the relief I felt since I could barely afford making the trip anyway. Sorry mum.

If you were having coffee with me I would share with you an interesting observation my mum made about her children whilst we were shopping together. We were standing in line to pay for groceries in a supermarket and my mum remarked “when I shop with my daughters we get served male cashiers but when I am with my sons we go to cash registers with female cashiers” I asked her what she was implying and she just laughed and said nothing at all, nothing all just an observation.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that I have finally watched Black Panther I am late to this party but #WakandaForever watch out for my review coming shortly……

#Wakandaforever

If we were having coffee with me, I would ask you if you remember that crazy queen from history books whom when her people were complaining they could not had no bread she said let them eat cake … I kinda feel that’s what our current president did when presented with the challenges the country was facing he said
“let them smoke weed”

Explaining the rasta colours scarf

#ThisScarf

Medicinal marijuana has been legalised in Zim. The production and growing which requires licences and registration fees in the range $50000: Zimbabwe is open for business.

Yes I know it’s not that he legalized the use of recreational marijuana but to the man on the street that’s what the announcement means, even my mum has forwarded me a marijuana related joke.

~B

PS How did you spend your Mother’s Day?
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that I was supposed to have this post on my blog on Mother’s Day after I had finished my surprise phone call to mother but I changed my Wi-Fi password because I suspected someone was helping themselves to my Wi-Fi; probably mining bitcoins with it from the way my wifi package was getting depleted. Well I changed it and couldn’t remember what I changed it to……. Oh what larks 😂 😂

Of Coffee With Best Laid Plans

If you were having coffee with me I would welcome you like an expected favoured guest, and tell you to kindly disregard the mess, just find somewhere to sit and make yourself at home….. what will your poison be? I am having lemon tea which may or may not have a nip of gin.

This is ought to be day 17 of my blog everyday challenge but unforeseen circumstances kept my posting schedule rather erratic. When you plan things in your head everything is in a neat straight line but life likes to throw curve balls, whats important is what you do with them, catch and throw back!!!!

Reality Vs Your Plan

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that my grandma was laid to rest following a beautiful catholic mass. My uncle, a staunch Seventh Day Adventist (for some reason they do not see eye to eye with Catholics) even made the comment that the singing was beautiful ruined only by drums that were played in the background. He likened it to someone preparing a scrumptious meal and then ruining it by adding way too much hot spice. I felt a twinge of guilt because I rather like my meals spicy; but they say one man’s meat…..

If you were having coffee with me; I would tell you how South Africa’s president Jacob Zuma resigned on Wednesday evening, well it was either that or risk an impeachment process. Its a situation somewhat reminiscent of what happened with our own president, it makes one question if democracy and electoral processes aren’t really just an elaborate scheme without real substance.

It would also be with deepest regret I informed you the passing away of one of the champions of democracy in Zimbabwe; President of the opposition party The Movement for Democratic Change MDC Morgan Tsvangirai. At one time he was poised to be president of the country but the former president Robert Mugabe had run-off elections declared followed by a rerun election in which he won a landslide victory. Again this is also why I wonder what democracy means to Africa because every other country seems to have problems with its presidency, its even rumoured that the colon cancer Morgan Tsvangirai had was somehow induced to take him out of the political field, but people talk, people will always talk………

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that………… the only thing better than hanging only metres above a smoking volcano; for a breathtaking, front seat view. of a volcano erupting, dangling from a helicopter, whose pilot’s definition of fun is to let go of the controls , wave both hands and say “look ma NO HANDS”... Is to have someone to share it with…

Audience

Here are a few choice posts from fellow bloggers taking part in my #FEBlog Challenge

FEblog Challenge

Dante #Feblog Day 15: Democracy Just another word in the dictionary

Mel #Feblog Day 2 Dating And Social Media Expectations

Mable Maybe 

Quarter Wife I’ll be Watching the Relationship Olympics, Thanks

 

~B

 

 

Of A Lady’s Handbag

If you were having coffee with me; I would tell you how as a guy, I am always; let’s call it “in awe” of the things women carry in their handbags….

It’s a whole dimension in itself in there; reminds me of Felix The Cat’s bag….

Felix the cat magic back with universe inside

If I was to ever re-invent a handbag, I would probably include a built in light, similar to the one you find on a fridge that goes on when you open it…. (I have seen ladies struggling to find something they are sure they put in their handbag and I would almost make the suggestion to them; that they should carry a torch, for such moments…. but on account of me rather liking my head firmly attached to my neck and breathing and stuff I just silently watch and make no comment…..)

Vanity light inside handbag

A vanity light inside a handbag how about that….

If you were having coffee with me; I would tell you that my mom’s handbag holds something you can see without ever opening it….

She carries a sermon in her handbag…….

Mum.jpg

How does one carry a sermon in handbag you ask? Well, good question and I am glad you asked it, because today is your lucky Sunday….

One side of her handbag is completely scarlet and

scarlet.jpgthe other side has a scarlet part and a white.

Red & whiteA message of His infinite forgiveness:

Isaiah 1:18 “Come now, let us settle the matter,” says the LORD.“Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.”They say He works in mysterious ways and if something as simple as handbag can carry a message what about His wonderful creation……..

 

Isaiah 53:5 “….By his stripes we are healed…“

They say He works in mysterious ways and if something as simple as handbag can carry a message what about His wonderful creation……..

If you were having coffee with me I would ask you if you saw the lunar eclipse a few nights ago and if you stayed up to watch the meteor shower…..

partial lunar eclipse Southern hemisphere

I watched the partial lunar eclipse but on this side of the hemisphere the Perseid Meteor Shower was mostly disapponting maybe because I was somewhat misled by a hoax message that claimed this would be the brightest meteor shower in 96 years (Thanks to Google I knew the message was claim was fake) but still I expected something like a New year’s fire works display….

New Year Fireworks; Harare, Zimbabwe

New Year Fireworks; Harare, Zimbabwe

And all I saw was only one shooting star…

The Perseid Meteor Shower happens every year peaking around July/August …who knew …maybe next year I will have a friend with telescope and an observation deck and we can count the stars….

A starry night is the salt of the universe revealing mysteries the sun hides

Have an awesome week

~B

 

 

Of Coffee And Shiny New Lessons

If you were having coffee with me we would be trying out my shiny new kettle……

Shiny Africa .jpg

I would thank you for visiting and let you know that you are like my shiny new kettle, with the wonky instructions manual, hard to understand but absolutely worth it……

instructions

if you can make sense of this…..

In case you are curious and wondering what happened to the old kettle…. I tried to fix it and I failed… I also learnt a few things too…

old kettle.jpg

You know when an appliance comes with the warning tag No User Serviceable Parts, what they mean is Do Not Attempt To Fix This by Yourself unless you are trained professional but I still insist on taking it as a personal challenge……

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that there are lots of things I have learnt, which is my fancy way of telling you that I may or may not have made some mistakes in life….

Things I learned not to do in life……..

Never Ever:

  • Check the temperature of water in a kettle by dipping hand into the kettle….
  • Touch hot stove tops……..
  • Kick at snakes venomous or otherwise, in fact, snakes should just stay away from me please and thank you …….
  • Poke wasps nests with a stick……..
  • Play in traffic……..
  • Look for shoes under the bed with a candle…
  • Super glue fingers together…
  • Lick the inside metal of the freezer…
  • Put metal objects in electricity outlets….
  • Lick electric wires to taste check if there is power….
  • Look under a lawnmower to see why it’s making so much noise……….
  • NOT Check the ceiling height and clearance for low hanging chandeliers and any other ornaments before tossing a toddler into the air over your head….
  • And when I write a book to check for errors extensively before I have it published
  • and lastly……
    never……
    ever …….. look inside a lady’s handbag….

If you were having coffee with me I won’t tell you what I saw, but I have learnt my lesson, curiosity kills nine lived cats and I have only one.

How has your week been? I hope your weekend is going great.

If you were coffee with me, I would tell you that I have been following social media commentary on a book titled From A to B written by South African TV personality Bonang.

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Her book has been making a buzz because of typos and grammar problems. It is kind of weird to note most of the people who have suddenly become book critics well havent read the book but have just seen the same screenshot(s) from the book circulating on the interweb and have formed opinions and made remarks of not only the book, but the author as well, as if one wakes up and decides what typos should I make in my book today. Ironically enough I spotted a tweet or two with grammar atrocities busy making fun of Bonang’s typos……

While I am not excusing the author, I mean one owes it to the people who are going to spend their hard earned money on you to create something worth their time and the publishing companies ought to do their due diligence instead of damage control

What do you think?

~B

 

 

photocredit Bonang Instagram